Hey we are humans first.... human warmth of Vietnam - continued....

30May2011 This evening I stood in the edge of the park next to the biggest roundabout in the center of Saigon, waiting for a Vietnamese friend. Motorbikes, cars, busses, traffic, people, noise, lights, a gentle drizzling rainy season rain.

I stand up on the ledge of the flower bed so as to be clearly visible.

On the other side of the flower bed a young University age Vietnamese lady walked past, smiling brighly.

I smiled back and she wandered over to talk.

"Where are you from ?"

"Australia"
Practicing her English I assume.

"Melbourne or Sydney...?" she really tried hard to remember the names of those two big cities.

Going through the "where are you from....? What do you do.... ?" routine usually makes me cringe. But the happy enthusiasm with which she spoke was disarming. Genuine and friendly.

"What do you ...."

"I teach Electronic Engineering....blah blah blah..."

"What are you doing ?

"Just playing" she says. I assume this to mean just wandering around to practice her English.

People who practice English sometimes use it as a front to sell tours or gems or whatever schemes.
That's not the case right now.

What strikes me most about her is that is she is genuine.

I'm actually shocked that a complete stanger, would simply smile and talk to another complete stranger just like that. It's me who has to overcome my cultural inhibitions.

She tells me in all earnestness about her dream, that she wants to learn Italian but has trouble finding people to practice with.

My friend now arrives. On a piece of paper, I write the name of a site where Vietnamese and foreigners meet in a safe, monitored space ( Couchsurfing.org Saigon group ). It is for people to stay with others on their floor or couches and it has a nice informal social group in Saigon - and most major cities of the world.

She might find italian or other other language exhange there.

What surprised me most was the simple human trust, not stupid naivety, but trust in herself, to judge who to talk to. The guts to talk to a total stranger.

I don't think it has much to do with me, - though then again I have noticed that even in a long line of people, beggars will often magnetically gravitate to me. Why ? Who knows.

As we talked all the Western warnings about strangers whizzed through my mind. I simply couldn't imagine his happening in my home town. I'm used to a guarded scowl on the face of strangers and someone asking me the time, makes me suspicious.

I remember something I read on Alastair Humphreys blog:

....I rode right across Europe and into the Middle East. Far from being the dangerous place I had always seen on the TV News, people waved to me as I passed, families invited me to stay the night in their homes or join them for a meal. I learned a crucial lesson about the world during those hot, dusty weeks: whatever governments are shouting angrily about, whatever extreme sections of society may be doing, the vast majority of people on Earth are good, ordinary people just like you and I. I rode through 60 countries on my circumnavigation, and in each country this held true. The world is, by and large, a good place. Traveling opened my eyes to that. .... from: Alastair Humphreys writing about adventure

After writing the earlier blog "Hey we are humans first.... human warmth of Vietnam" this is another one of 'those confirmations'.

Vietnam has had a horrific history of war, children are still being born deformed from the effects of the war. And yet, I can walk around this city and experience such things.
Amazing.

• About Couchsurfing
• Haiko's Profile on CS
• Saigon group on CS

31May2011... update: the lady I wrote about above joined Couchsurfing and was pleased to see THIS blog here, about our meeting.
Small world.

Hey we are humans first.... human warmth of Vietnam

in some places ....
in some place people still feel more REAL.

how are they more real ?
example:  Saigon, Vietnam:
taxi to airport.
I offer the driver some of my favourite, chocolate bisquits.
"Oh, no thanks"
Ok I expected that.
He drives too fast, too dangerous, I don't like to see poeple hurt. 

I put my hand on his shoulder, make soft sounds, "sloooooowwwww"
He gets the idea.
His driving is calm, nice now. I don't fear that we will injure someone.
At the airport he fills in the taxi voucher for my Taxi card from work.
"Can I have a bisquit. I'm so hungry, can't drive anymore."
Sure, I give him the rest of the packet. 
There was no guile in him. 
He was being real. 
How do I know ? I felt it. It's real but not quantyfiable

At the four star Hotel in Hanoi:
"What do you do ?" (it's obvious I live in Vietnam)
"I teach Engineering."
"Where do you teach ?" 
etc....
genuine interest in me from the staff serving the buffet breakfast.
They have real smiles.
They talk like real people,
asking questions because they want to know. Not for some policy, or shut up because of some moronic corporate  policy.
I find out that the tall one is a student,
has no boyfriend, but will marry one day. 
They got up at 5am to serve breakfast at 6am. 
But not everyday, sometimes it's an afternoon shift ... . 

Lots of other stuff, - casual fun talk over breakfast to make the time more pleasant.
Yes, I'm the customer, and they are the staff, but, Hey! We are people, humans first.
Forgive me if I have a chip on shoulder, but I have the impressing in the developed rich 'civilized' world, I'd be dealing with professional employees toeing the corporate line first and a human being second.

Back in the developed world: I was stopped at airport security.

"What's that in your breast pocket ?" 

Metal detector had not gone off and it looked like a passport, in fact it WAS a passport.

I went into my antipathy to authority attitude, meaning: sullen silence. 

Handed over passport with the inner attitude of "here we go again, more moronic regulations just to let some wanker feel important"
“Hallo!” the guard said to me, - meaning, lets be human first, and say ‘Hi’, ok ?
“Hallo” I said, and I realized I’d been grumpy. I'd gone into "I'm in an anal retentive society" defensive attitude again.
That's probably not fair.
I admit this may be an overeaction on my part.
When in civilized countries, I tend to play my part in the dance of the 'moronic bureaucrats' very well.

As my friend said: you can't have one hand clapping.  

30May2011 This evening I stood in the edge of the park next to the biggest roundabout in the center of Saigon, waiting for a Vietnamese friend. Motorbikes, cars, busses, traffic, people, noise, lights, a gentle drizzling rainy season rain.
I stand up on the ledge of the flower bed so as to be clearly visible. 
On the other side of the flower bed a young University age Vietnamese lady walked past, smiling brighly. 
I smiled back and she wandered over to talk. 
Practice her English I assumed. 
"Where are you from ?" 
"Australia" 
"Melbourne or Sydney...?" she really tried hard to remember the names of those two big cities. 
Going through the "where are you from....?" routine usually makes me cringe. But the happy enthusiasm with which she spoke was disarming. Genuine and friendly. 
"What do you ...." 
"I teach Electronic Engineering....blah blah blah..." 
"What are you doing ?
"Just playing" she says. I assume this to mean just wandering around to practice her English. 

People who claim to practice English sometimes use it a front to sell tours or gems or whatever schemes. 


What strikes me most about her is that is she is genuine. 
I'm actually shocked that complete stanger, would simply talk to another complete stranger just like that. 
She tells me in all earnestness that she wants to learn Italian but has trouble finding people to practice with. 
My friend now arrives. On a piece of paper, I write the name the Couchsurfing site where Vietnamese and foreigners meet in a safe, monitored space. It is for people to stay with others on their floor or couches and it has a nice informal social group in most major cities. 
She might find italian or other other language exhange there. 

What surprised me most was the simple human trust, not stupid naivety, but trust in herself, to judge who to talk to. The guts to talk to a total stranger. 

I don't think it has much to do with me, - thogh then again I have noticed that even in a long line of people, beggars will often magnetically gravitate to me. Why ? Who knows.
As we talked all the Western warnings about strangers whizzed through my mind. I simply couldn't imagine his happening in my home town. I'm used to a guarded scowl on the face of strangers and someone asking me the time, makes me suspicious. 

I'm reminded of the stuff others like Alastair Humphreys  said 

I rode right across Europe and into the Middle East. Far from being the dangerous place I had always seen on the TV News, people waved to me as I passed, families invited me to stay the night in their homes or join them for a meal. I learned a crucial lesson about the world during those hot, dusty weeks: whatever governments are shouting angrily about, whatever extreme sections of society may be doing, the vast majority of people on Earth are good, ordinary people just like you and I. I rode through 60 countries on my circumnavigation, and in each country this held true. The world is, by and large, a good place. Traveling opened my eyes to that. from: Alastair Humphreys writing about adventure

After writing the above blog  "Hey we are humans first.... human warmth of Vietnam" this is another one of 'those confirmations'.



 

the secret is: adults don't exist

Today I went for dinner with a colleague, her little 8 year old daughter and her grandmother. 

She told me something her daughter discovered. 

"There are no adults. They don't exist. They are really all children."

Out of the mouth of babes.....

I'm totally with her on that.